indobet 88 Good Lord…

… I’ve been ignoring you folks for far too long!

Not much indobet 88 being played these days. I’m too exhausted after working all day, and just can’t get in the right frame of mind. Keeping a low profile in the poker rooms until the mind is right.

So, I did tell you that I had a new job a few weeks ago. It’s gone pretty well, except for today. It’s in retail, I’ve turned out to be a pretty good salesman…

Me: I don’t know why they just bought that – I didn’t know shit about the

product.

Boss: You were nice to her. She had to buy and wanted to buy from YOU.

… but I’m not handling assholes very well. I already posted a diatribe at my diet blog (down 61 lbs, TYVM). Here’s an excerpt:

It’s a simple litmus test: Would I be embarassed if my daughters heard someone speaking to me this way? If the answer is “Yes”, the response is not to respond in kind; rather, I think it best to point out to the person that their behavior is unacceptable…

…I’ve done a very good job the last few months of setting aside the false pride associated with the cachet of a job and salary. I was even noodling around with a post about Real Pride vs. false pride. Something along the lines of “false pride is thinking you’re too good/important/smart/rich to take a step back, while Real Pride is shown by a willingness to provide for your family despite the pay or ‘status’ of the job.” I didn’t post it because it was sounding sort of … well… prideful.

I’ve wasted a lot of time in the last year because of my own false pride, and progress and momentum were regained in every area of my life where I ‘got

over it’.

I didn’t want to walk/run in public because I was fat: I got over it and lost 61 lbs.

I didn’t want to work retail because it didn’t pay enough: I got over it and make a bit more than the NOTHING I was making.

But there’s also a tension that exists between modesty and false modesty; being able to contribute more to the world, to society, to your community, and most importantly, too your family, than you currently do. Saying things like “I’m not good/pretty/handsome/smart/thin/rich enough”. That’s false modesty. That’s a victim’s mentality.

So, when an asshole acts like an asshole and TRIES to demean me in the process, he will discover that a job doesn’t define me. No one is allowed to treat me like a child. I won’t sink to his level, but he will know he’s dealing with an ADULT who is PROUD of himself.

The final answer, of course, is to find a job/life/calling (whatever!) that permits me to contribute more of my talents to the world. To feel like I’ve given all I have to give. To lay it all out there so that when I reach the pearly gates, St. Peter greets me with a “Well Done!”

I can do more, and I will do more. To channel John Lennon for a moment, Imagine a world where we all tried to contribute more of our talents.

Yeah, I don’t know what it is I will do that is “more”. But, I feel like I’m starting something and can’t wait to see where I take it.

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